Fishermen catch Fish.
Cops catch Robbers.
And Moms catch Poop.
Yes, moms catch poop - it's in the fine print, and a thankless job. But it's either that, or let it fall on a clean-and-laid-out rug, just pulled from the dryer moments before.
I think I've finally and formally and officially been introduced to motherhood. And I feel lucky. Yes, I do! (I'm being completely honest!)
Tanner came to me yesterday (after NO ACCIDENTS, but potty breaks every 20 minutes) and said, "Mommy, I poop! Help! I need a bwoo smiley face sicker." And as I look at my distressed two-year-old, he has indeed pooped - and after eating half a box of fruit loops, it was easy to catch. Solid. Solid. And, Solid. So sorry for the graphics. I'll keep it down from here on out.
So while he's dry-heaving and gaging next to the toilet, I'm dumping what's left in his underwear (the cutest little briefs with lizards all over them). I think I'll print myself up a little certificate. If you'd like one for being a hero-mom, let me know and I'll print one up for you, too! Seriously. You all think I'm joking! I'm not.
And just in case you were wondering, and you shouldn't, but if you should, I washed my hands thoroughly at least five times, and once with straight Clorox. I think I got it all. I'm sure I got it all.
Bring. It. On.
11 comments:
Your story put my Anna pooping in the tub story to SHAME. Shame I say! I think you indeed need a certificate - framed. I hope you do a post about it when it happens too ;)
Oh Deanna - I'm glad you're documenting these stories. Someday when he thinks his mom doesn't care about him, you'll be able to go back to this and show your son how much you really do love him:)
Christy pooped once in her swimming suit at Lake Powell...it got loose...it was a floaty....
Been there, done that! LOL
Motherhood takes us places we never thought we would go, huh? I had a really hard time trying to get my daughter here from heaven, so I'm **loving every minute of being a mom**, and all the adventures along the way!
Bring it! :-)
Deanna you crack me up. That's the funniest story ive heard in a long time. At least it wasn't diarreah!! I love the bring it on!
Great story. Motherhood brings on all sorts of adventures for sure. That hits the top of the list.
Yes, I have been there, can i have a certificate! Now that my older two are trained, I am not looking forward to training Lucy in a couple of years:). Although, I must admit how good it feels to have a potty trained kid, it's like you are official or something:)
DING-DING-DING!!! We have a Winner!!! Cherisse, I need your address. My email is rdpoulsen{at}gmail{dot}com.
I actually had someone say they wanted a certificate, so I'm gonna make one!!!
haha, i am so looking forward to the post about the actual certificate....lets think of a good place to put it....maybe in the entry way of your house so all is sure to see it...i think that is a fabulous idea
Being a mom is so glamorous, isn't it?
Okay, I have one for you. The other day I was changing Baer's diaper just after he went "stinky" as we call it here. I get the diaper off and am getting a new one ready and he just starts going again. With my cat-like reflexes I grabbed the wipe next to me and caught it. Unfortunately it wasn't firm and there was a lot of it but only a small part of it got on my hand. I was pretty proud of myself for catching it before it got on the carpet though.
Oh, and one time James was going potty standing up at the toilet and he accidently relaxed too much and went "stinkies" while he was going peepee. He called "Help Mom, my stinkies!!" Fortunatley those were firm and easier to clean up and he was able to finish his stinkies in the toilet.
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