Today was a big day...for Tanner and I both. I've been paying more attention to when he talks to me, because I'm finally getting the hint that he hears and understands more than I give him credit for, hence this little doosie:
Taylor approaching the TV to turn it off/on.
Tanner: "Oh, Hell. Taylor knock it off!"
Yeah. Proud mommy-moment over. Just when I thought they could play well together, our three-year-old is swearing at our one-year-old and using it in context!!! Great. Guess I/we have a LOT of work to do. Oh, how ironic it is, that Hevenly Father blessed us with children "Just Like Us!"
Ryan and I are AWEFUL parents when it comes to brushing teeth. In fact, we don't brush our children's teeth (well, Tanner's...Taylor still has NO TEETH at fourteen months!) except on rare occasions, like Sunday mornings, and even that was sporadic.
I noticed some 'buildup' a few months ago, and promised myself I'd do a better job, I even bought Tanner a toothbrush that sang. I know. It doesn't do justice to the plaque unless it's in action!
Well, last week, I noticed it had gotten REALLY BAD. Tooth "c" (pointy in front) and "e" & "f" (two front) were exceptionally bad. I panicked, called the first pediatric/family dentist I saw in the phone book, and said I had to get him in.
So, today we had our FIRST visit to the dentist. Unfortunately, it wont be the last...I mean, I planned on starting routinely visits around age four or five...Tanner never got his first tooth till after he turned one, for crying out loud! (I think we used that as a false sense of security, thinking he would have 'good, strong teeth'). But now, we have three visits set up and scheduled over the next two months to 'fix' the damage. I'm pretty sure we're going to be a regular customer!
After all the hoo-haw and hum-haw, the dentist finally came in (do you know how hard it is for a nervous three-year-old to sit in a chair with lots of 'stuff' around him, even with the tv on the ceiling?!?!) and took a quick (4 minutes) look, apparently worth $48 and confirmed that Tanner would, indeed, need to have THREE cavities filled!!! At least they're filled with white instead of silver...it's been a while since I've had my two cavities filled....and I was 20 when I had them!
Anyways, what I really wanted to say is that on the way over to the dentist, Tanner threw-up...just a little bit. This is how that experience went down as I was trying to locate ONE office building in a myriad of 50 stylish office buildings:
Tanner: "Mommy, I sorry. I made a mess"
Me: "What happened?" thinking it couldn't be too bad, he was strapped in a 50-harness car restraint!
Tanner: "I threw. Up." in a worried little voice.
Me: "What happened?"
Tanner: "I chocked on my fingernail in my neck." (what?!?!?)
Me: frantically looking for the right building, "oh, Tanner!" in an annoyed voice, thinking, "now he's going to stink and be all 'dirty'...what are these people going to think! I don't brush my child's teeth or wash his clothes or bathe him!"
Tanner: "I sorry mommy. I just want to make you happy."
Yeah. It got me, too. I wanted to stop and bawl right then and there.
It hit me. The best way to describe it is like driving along and BAM! there's a snow bank. It looks fluffy enough, but when you and it meet, it's not fluffy. In fact, it hurts, and it hurts horribly bad.
All Tanner EVER tries to do it to get our attention...to get us to notice him. That phrase alone has forever changed my life. Whether he's trying to set the table, move his brother out of harm's way, or put his clothes away in a pile under his bed, he's just trying to make me happy.
Tanner will frequently ask us, "Daddy? You Happy?" or "Mommy? I happy, You Happy?" I have started to answer "Yes" (or "No", but explain as lovingly as possible why his actions made me sad) and will quickly change my attitude from being stressed for WHATEVER reason, and give him some time...it's a start, right?
14 comments:
Aren't kids wonderful at reminding us what is really important and causing us to stop and think about the little things that we are doing! Good luck at the denist! I haven't taken my boys in either! Maybe I should!
Kids have the darndest way of putting things into perspective so quickly. How cute that he just wants to make you happy? I have been paranoid about Anna's teeth since mine are horrible and I don't want her to have to pay for all the stuff I have - even though I brush and floss regularly. I am anal with brushing and fluoride and she has been to the dentist every 6 months ever since she was one and she was a late teether too. Maybe you and I should meet somewhere in the middle ;)
Kids are great reminders of what we need to work on. Don't worry your not along on the swearing thing. However, Lily picked it up from the TV because we don't use the word she does. Needless to say we learned to stop watching TV when she was around. I feel for you on the teeth thing. I took Lily in for a similar problem. The white on the teeth. Apparently her's wasn't as bad as Tanner's though. She has been seeing her dentist for about a year now. We have had to start using fluoride toothpaste to head off the cavity problem. My dentist says she has "weak" teeth though. Brushing teeth is hard to remember to do. Lily reminds us more often than not :) Don't get to down on yourself, ok?! You are a great mom who is juggling a very difficult life right now. Things get away from all of us, and we always wish we could recall some action or another that our little ones pick up. Sorry so long!
Kids are great aren't they. I think god gave them to us so we could remember all the stuff we should be when our world is so filled with chaos and we think we know it all. At least that is my explantion for it and that makes me happy.
Oh Deanna! He sounds like a little sweetheart but it is so hard to be patient huh?! I think you are doing a good job! At least you're trying to learn from your mistakes...it seems like it takes me over and over and over to learn some things just to relearn them again. If it makes you feel any better, some kids or people are just prone to more cavities no matter how much they brush their teeth. A lady that works in a dentist office told me that the other day.
Oh, you are so not alone! I think we have paid for the dentist's entire car with all our visits. I vow every time we go in to be better about teeth brushing, but ughhh...I am the worst. And I laughed my head off about the "hell" comment. SOOOO funny! Nothing like hearing yourself from your 3 year old.
We never fail until we give up and quit. Keep trying. And know, Deanna, you are NOT alone! Every morning, I think, "Today is going to better than yesterday. Today, I will be nicer, more patient and more loving to my children than I was yesterday." Somedays are okay. Other days, I wonder if I should have just stayed in bed.
Good luck! We're all in this together.
Deanna! You are wonderful! I love you so much~And so do your boys.
Love you heaps
<3
Stephanie
I love reading your posts! Thanks so much for sharing this - it's a great reminder for me as a mom...(and i will try to be better in the teeth dept. too!). I can't wait to hear about your meeting! email me sometime! :)
Don't worry too much about the cavities, I don't think any child on earth has worse teeth than Dax-he had to have oral surgery and SIX caps when he was three. And it is so sweet that that really is all kids want, for us to be happy and proud of them. We probably could all pay more attention, but i have a hard time believing that you are the best mom ever:) And also, those beds can be bunk beds. Send me an email to egeldmacher@gmail.com if you want. Have a good day (night)!
so cute, i probably would have stopped and bawled too!! i should do better with coops teeth, i brush them every night, but really should do it morning and night...baa...he has his daddys teeth so if i don't brush them, you can tell...lovely genetics
That is the sweetest thing I have heard in a while. He sounds like such a good boy always trying to make you happy. I have one of those in my own life. I think it is something about being the oldest child. Thank goodness for the good times with kids so when it rough we can remember the good. You are a great mom. :)
Deanna. I just loved this post. I love your mommy-heart. Sending you hugs. ♥
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