Teeth are {not} tools - {what happened}

I was hurrying to get out the door to go to my mother-in-law's house to pick raspberries before it got too hot Wednesday morning and thought I would multi-task breakfast & getting ready.  Tanner and Taylor asked for yogurts after their toast, and I usually tell them 'no', because that's what Ryan eats for breakfast at 5 am...and we were running low...I gave in to my better judgement, and finally consented to let them have a yogurt, as it would give me about 3 more minutes to make beds, and do the dishes.  Or at least start on those things.  :)

I had just brushed my teeth, so my hands were wet...and you can't open the foil on a Yoplait Yogurt with wet hands.  It doesn't work.  Obviously.


Here's a little background story you should know:

When I was 9 years old, my cousin Wesley and I were arguing over a croquet mallet (but the mallet had been twisted off, so it was just the stick) when he let go gave up and I won, breaking off my right front tooth.  It was about 8:30 in the evening, and I'm sure my mom had to send cousins home and load us all in the suburban to go to the dentist's office.  Luckily for me, my dad's cousin was our dentist, and within an hour of it breaking off, he had my tooth glued back on, and we went home.  My tooth was grand for 9 years.

When I was 18, I thought I had a giant zit or something in my nose, because the whole front of my face hurt...but then I discovered that it had nothing to do with my nose or zits of any kind...just a big ole' festered abscess in the root of that front tooth and in my jaw.  That's why it hurt so bad.

So right before I started college I had four wisdom teeth pulled, my teeth whitened, and a root canal done on that front tooth.  During the root canal, the dentist suggested I get a cap put on, because it would look funny after whitening (because it was dead...and an off color).  So we decided to do that, knowing that he would put porcelain caps on BOTH my front teeth.  For a moment there I looked like Sloth from Goonies.

So, for the past nine years, I've had nice pearly whites...well, porcelain whites in front.  Until yesterday morning...

When I couldn't open the yogurt with my fingers, I did the next best thing, and used my teeth to pull the aluminum tab up and off.  When I thought I had gotten a bit of residual glue from the foil, and had foil in my teeth, I learned the bitter truth:  I had just ripped off the front of the cap of the GOOD TOOTH!

Long story short:

I spent two hours in the dentist chair reading Hatchet and watching Toddlers and Tiaras (those mom's are nuts!) and another 30 minutes being drilled, poked, prodded, numbed, drilled, cast (the nasty gunk to make a mold), feeling like Sloth on Goonies again, and on and on till  a suitable temporary front tooth could be made.

I go back to get the permanent pearly white in about two weeks.

*sigh*

Teeth are not for biting nails.  Use clippers.
Teeth are not for clipping threads.  Use scissors.
Teeth are not for opening bottles.  Use a bottle opener.
Teeth are not for tearing off otter-pops.  Use a knife.

Teeth are not Tools.  They are for eating food.  And making happy smiles.  Hopefully my smile will be back to normal after I get the permanent in...for now, I'll just suffer through the sensitivity and hole in my tongue for playing with this temporary tooth that isn't smooth.

Thank you mom and dad and husband and baby-sitter for your love and support during this frustrating moment of life.  ♥♥♥